


Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony - Texts

by mindruntaro



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Multi, i got bored sssh, sort of crackfic, the 5000th of these
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-10 15:05:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8921791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mindruntaro/pseuds/mindruntaro
Summary: Akamatsu decides to ease the tension by adding everybody into a group chat.Little does she know that everybody, over texts, are completely different people.
[Also, AU where the Digital Handbooks have texting abilities.]





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Names:  
> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill hair  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**Paino joined the group.**

**humansexual joined the group.**

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee joined the group.**

**killerWeebstar joined the group.**

**windmill hair joined the group.**

**spacesucc joined the group.**

**XxShadyEmoxX joined the group.**

**amummy joined the group.**

**insex joined the group.**

**hammeraesthetic joined the group.**

**dicktato joined the group.**

**oblivious joined the group.**

**antichildren joined the group.**

**midgetmurderer joined the group.**

**poofpoofmagik joined the group.**

**kinkyshiz joined the group.**

 

**Paino:** welcome to the group !!

**XxShadyEmoxX:** Why. Am. I. Named. This. Akamatsu?

**Paino:** i'm sorry but i don't make the rules---

**antichildren:** Why was this group created...?

**Paino:** because don'tcha think that all of this killing stuff is doing our heads in,,,

**Paino:** it's making us all a little,,, stale ---

**dicktato:** AS YOUR LEADER I DEMAND THAT MY NAME IS CHANGED

**Paino:** i'm sorry ouma but you're not the leader anymore,,, i'm the admin of the group boi

**dicktato:** go jump off a cliff akamatsu

**Paino:** noted. now is everyone here?

**midgetmurderer:** my name is satire... i doubt you should be taking the title of a murderer so lightly.

**hammeraesthetic:** hey, hey~ don't be so gloomy, angie LIKES the names, so be happy~!!!

**poofpoofmagik:** i also sorda like my name :3

**humansexual:** I'm afraid I don't quite understand mine.

**amummy:** wow i never knew akamatsu could make a pun out of my name... but also, im afraid i get your name all too well shinguuji.

**humansexual:** Wait a minute... are you mocking my title?

**Paino:** well, rather your personality but let's move on from that--

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee has left the group.**

**Paino added IsThatASpeckOfDustISee to the group.**  
  
Paino: i'm sorry toujou but there's no escape. i just disabled leaving so you're pretty much fucked


	2. Oumami

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ouma and Amami screaming late at night and summoning everybody.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**amummy has joined the group.**

**dicktato has joined the group.**

 

**dicktato:** oh you're on ---

**amummy:** yes why wouldn't i be--

**dicktato:** i don't know maybe because it's like three thiRTY IN THE MORNING AMAMI

**amummy:** i know but still

**dicktato:** sleep is for the weak

**amummy:** well then you should sleep because yesterday you fucking cried because you stubbed your toe

**dicktato:** S H U T  Y O U R  M O U T H  A M A M I

**amummy:** you're so cute aaaa

**dicktato:** WHAT DID I JUST SAY TO YOU AMAMI

**amummy:** omggggg stoppp

**Paino has joined the group.**

**dicktato:** SEE, LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE

**Paino:** woah calm down i heard somebody being called cute so i was summoned

**Paino:** well i mean i saw the notifications so

**amummy:** well he is,,,,,

**Paino:** o h MY GOD THIS IS SO GAY

**dicktato:** i K n OW IM TRYING TO GET HIM TO STOP

**Paino:** nO IT'S CUTE KEEP GOING

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee has joined the group.**

**Paino:** well look who decided to show up

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee:** i came to tell you all to go get a life and STOP TEXTING AT UNGODLY HOURS

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee has left the group.**

**Paino:** i hardly call these ungodly hours it's only 4am rn

**amummy:** well i guess she likes to sleep idk

**dicktato:** isnt that the case with most people tho ??

**amummy:** it is? the more you know,,,

**Paino:** im probably going to go back on my word and sleep because you guys woke me up so

**dicktato:** i don't know if im sorry or not but ok

**Paino has left the group.**

**amummy:** ouma you really are cute though

**Paino has joined the group.**

**dicktato:** AMAMI STOP

**Paino:** you guys are unbelievable

**amummy:** you want us to stop? ouma meet me in my room,,, that's the only way i'll stop

**dicktato:** i know what you're thinking amami---

**dicktato:** but im not completely against that-

 

**Paino:** guys it's been like an hour and a half and i think i can hear you violently fucking is this true

**killerWeebstar has joined the group.**

**killerWeebstar:** i am like riiight next to them and it's as clear as day

**killerWeebstar:** i.e yes they are violently making love it's official oumami is canon

**Paino** : oh M YGOD IM CHOKING i want to sleep now---

**killerWeebstar:** same tho

**Paino has left the group.**

**killerWeebstar has left the group.**

 


	3. shinguuji just s t o p

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji being unintentionally terrible and Shirogane making Ouma very sad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**windmill has joined the group.**

**Paino:** oh you're here- everybody else is on apart from maki and toujou but tbh i don't blame them lol

**dicktato:** btw akamatsu the event from yesterday is never to be spoken about or you wiLL BURN IN HELL

**Paino:** i won't because they can see for themselves,,, i enabled the option to read the history of the group lmaooo

**dicktato:** WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

**amummy:** being gay isnt to be ashamed of ouma babe

**windmill:** WAIT THEY'RE A THING EW EW EW DISGUSTING

**dicktato:** THIS is why i dont want to be titled as a gay and btw NO WE WERE NOT VIOLENTLY MAKING LOVE SHIROGANE

**killerWeebstar posted an audio track.**

**killerWeebstar:** i recorded this last night while you two were violently making love and i think my point has been P R O V E N

**amummy:** oh 

**dicktato:** THIS IS AN INFRINGEMENT TO PRIVACY IM GONNA KILL MYSELF

**humansexual:** I doubt you'd commit suicide over this, Ouma. Human mating is a natural occurrence and if you were feeling particularly aroused, it surely would've been a great way to release that. Also, by the way you were making such eccentric sounds... I can guarantee you enjoyed it.

**dicktato:** SHINGUUJI FUCK YOU AND YOUR FANCY LITERATURE GTFO ALSO YOU ACTUALLY WATCHED THAT SHITTY AUDIO TRACK?!! YOU SICK BASTARD

**amummy:** aaaaaaa he's being cute again

**dicktato:** IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF IM NOT JOKING ALSO SHINGUUJI DON'T YOU DARE

**humansexual:** I give the two of you my best wishes on your relationship :)

**Paino:** boI HE USED A SMILEY,,,,, THE SHINGUUJI KOREKIYO USED A S M I LE Y THAT MEANS THAT HE MEAMS BUSINESS BOI\

**amummy:** shirogane and shinguuji has a nice ring to it you two should hook up lol

**killerWeebstar:** you're two months too late in saying so my friend

**humansexual:** I thought we had discussed this Shirogane... you weren't meant to say that.

**amummy:** I'M SCREEING IT'S MEME TEAM 2.0

**dicktato:** AMAMI NO WE'RE MEME TEAM WTF THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE

**amummy:** you went from being in the closet to being so openly gay ---

**dicktato:** S H U T  U P 

**hammeraesthetic:** ahh~ this is such a nice conversation~~~!!!  <3<3<3<3

**oblivious:** ui sfdajkjg uiiuw389 fjkds skjdlakeuhksjdh

**Paino:** kiibo wtf

**midgetmurderer:** i will go check on him. to see that he isn't malfunctioning.

**kinkyshiz:** I WANTED TO GO DO THAT (ONO)

**windmill:** MEN ARE DISGUSTING IRUMA DON'T GET NEAR THEM GUIUB,IU;DGI;HSFDIU;HDSGI;UHDSFIU;HFDSIUHGDSUIHDSH;GDIHGDSIHGIHFIHGIHIG

**Paino:** wow ok chabashira ---

**insex:** Surely we can behave better than this... you gentlemen in here... step up your game!

**XxShadyEmoxX:** i don't think they're as mature as you gokuhara but another thing... I STILL CANNOT GET OVER MY NAME IM NOT AN EMO IM JUST AN EMOTIONAL HORMONAL TEENAGER ISNT THAT NORMAL

**dicktato:** saihara wtf

**spacesucc:** hORMONAL TEENAGER IM SOBBING

**poofpoofmagik:** I SECOND THAT ^

**XxShadyEmoxX:** I MEAN,,,, WHAT

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee has joined the group.**

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee:** i see you are still being ungodly.

**Paino:** toujou,,, this is normal

**antichildren has joined the group.**

**antichildren:** babe is kiibo ok

**Paino:** idk

**windmill:** wait you're a thing too ?????? WELL THAT'S BETTER THAN THE OTHERS SDFGHJKL;

**oblivious:** wait hold on... this is hoshi by the way just hold on guys

 

 


	4. is kiibo okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kiibo is probably not okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**Paino:** is kiibo okay though

**oblivious:** yeah he's not dead he's just... confused.

**dicktato:** well i'm not surprised at all frankly

**amummy:** im concerned

**dicktato:** whY AMAMI WOULD YOU BETRAY ME

**amummy:** i have a social life

**dicktato:** like hell you do you confide in me amami

**dicktato:** well i want you to confide in me anyhow but yOU REFUSE TO DO SO

**amummy:** yes im the dom you dom-wannabe

**dicktato:** amami this is the public group

**amummy:** i totally didn't know that, whooops.

**dicktato:** DOES EXPOSURE TURN YOU ON OR SOMETHING AMAMI

**amummy:** i've been found out

**dicktato:** disgusting

**oblivious:** fear not, i am alrifhr.

**midgetmurderer:** he didn't know how to type he's fine

**kinkyshiz:** ya but we taught him so,,,, now he's getting better lol

**Paino:** THAT'S CUTE

**oblivious:** please stogsdoif.

**Paino** :THAT IS SO CUTE

**XxShadyEmoxX:** akamatsu dont swoon over him

**windmill:** EW DISGUSTING HE'S JEALOUS FILTHY MEN 

**XxShadyEmoxX:** I AM NOT DISGUSTING

**humansexual:** Sorry but you are a displeasure to look at. 

**spacesucc:** 'I AM NOT DISGUSTING' - emotional hormonal teenager

**XxShadyEmoxX:** omg i forgot i said that,,,,,,, you are not letting me live this down are you momota

**oblivious:** wait momota's here?? oh my i didnt make any mistakes!!

**spacesucc:** kiibo nice and yes im here why you would ignore

**oblivious:** I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT

**spacesucc:** i know babe you're fine lol i was teasing

**oblivious:** NOBODY'S MEANT TO KNOW ABOUT THAT

**Paino:** wait can you even date kiibo

**oblivious:** OF COURSE YOU CAN IM NOT A COMPLETE ROBOT YOU KNWOW

**Paino:** again wit hthe typos he's pissed

**spacesucc:** he's standing up for me get it right

**XxShadyEmoxX:** this is horrible

**spacesucc:** NO IT'S NOT IT'S NOT HORRIBLE IT'S TRUE LOVE

**midgetmurderer:** isnt kiibo technically inanimate though...?

**oblivious has left the group.**

**spacesucc has added oblivious to the group.**

**spacesucc:** babe no

**oblivious:** THEY ARE OFFENDING ME MOMOTA

**spacesucc:** sshhh it's ok

**oblivious:** CAN SOMEBODY SUE HOSHI AND SAIHARA FOR ME

**oblivious:** I WILL NOT HESITATE

**midgetmurderer:** woah calm down i taught you how to type on a digital handbook calm yo ass down

**XxShadyEmoxX:** i'm the only person in here who isn't an ass so you should show at least some gratitude kiibo

**dicktato:** no you're an ass too saihara 

**Paino:** soz babe i admit too

**antichildren:** wait babe-- akamatsu why i thought we had something special

**Paino:** wait wtf when did we ???

**XxShadyEmoxX:** yeah she's never dated you harukawa

**antichildren:** shiznit i thought i was in private msgs

**Paino:** SAME 

**dicktato:** guys you're awful

**amummy:** im not awful am i ??? it was only this morning that i satisfied you so i can't be that awful

**dicktato:** A M A M I         N                  O

**amummy:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**dicktato:** NO NOT ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) AMAMI

**amummy:**  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) why don't you love me ouma ? ? 

**dicktato:** i do... I MEAN SHUT UP AMAMI NO

**dicktato has left the group.**

**Paino has added dicktato to the group.**

**Paino:** sorry boi you're stuck with your gay-ass boyfriend for now

**amummy:** gay

**amummy:** ass

**amummy:** boyfriend

**amummy:** ouma meet me in my room those three words have triggered my emotions

**dicktato:** n O IM STILL SORE AMAMI

**amummy:** aw

**humansexual:** Shirogane, you have your handbook recorder... right?

**killerWeebstar:** ya babe

**insex:** I've also been wanting to ask... why don't any of you use any grammar?

**Paino:** ask saihara lolololol

**XxShadyEmoxX:** DON'T DUMP THEM ON ME

**Paino:**  lol sorry something important just came up bye saihara

**Paino is now playing an app.**

**XxShadyEmoxX:** omg AKAMATSU YOU'RE PLAYING GAMES ON YOUR DIGITAL HANDBOOK STOP

**Paino:** The message you sent could not be received because the recipient couldn't give a shit about your opinions.

**dicktato:** O HSAIHARA BURN

**amummy:** GET REKT SAIHARA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**hammeraesthetic:** aaaah you're all being mean ;n;

**poofpoofmagik:** no angie it's called sass 

**hammeraesthetic:** ah okay~~!!

**humansexual:** Saihara you still have not answered Gokuhara and I's question. Please do respond.

**XxShadyEmoxX:** beCAUSE I DON'T KNOW OK DX

**killerWeebstar:** ew he used the invert of XD

**hammeraesthetic:** yucky

**poofpoofmagik:** even angie doesn't like this and she likes everything

**dicktato:** did you reference a mcfucking bieber song

**poofpoofmagik:** ye

**amummy:** O H MY GOD 

**dicktato:** im gonna go 'hang' with amami now bye

**killerWeebstar:** more like violently make love haha where's my recording app lol

**humansexual:** I would like to witness the absolute beauty of human power. Kiibo, would you be able to assist...?

**oblivious:** i don't feel comfortable witnessing homosexual activity don't get me wrong i'm homosexual myself but it makes me feel strange

**spacesucc:** the last time he saw that he tried to fuck me and that didn't work out

**oblivious:** I DID NOT

**oblivious:** b-but... fine i guess. i'll burn a hole in the wall.

**spacesucc:** aren't you worried about them seeing the messages

**oblivious:** no because i can already hear them in their.. endeavours. 

**humansexual:** COME ON KIIBO I WANT TO SEE!!!

**antichildren:** wtf


	5. oumami 2.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more oumami and kiibo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**humansexual:** That... was a wonderful example of human power/beauty! Fantastic, @amummy and @dicktato!

**dicktato:** why was i tagged --- WAIT A MOMENT

**amummy:** didn't you know that they were watching...? i saw, so i just let it go ..

**dicktato:** THEY

**dicktato:** WERE

**dicktato:** WATCHING

**dicktato:** US

**dicktato:** AMAMI

**dicktato:** IM ACTUALLY CRYING IM NOT JOKING WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

**amummy:** omg ouma you're crying !!?!

**oblivious:** i can hear him im next door to him i think i hear sniffling

**Paino:** omg guys you made him cry

**humansexual:** I am so sorry Ouma...! I did not mean to upset you but... that really was beautiful.

**killerWeebstar:** ya, it was so cute aaa i got to experience irl yaoi!!! ouma you're a cute moaner btw ??

**oblivious:** if you want to know how many of us were there, it was shirogane, shinguuji and i.

**XxShadyEmoxX:** i could also hear you guys. you're loud af lol

**dicktato:** GUYS THIS ISN'T FUNNY IM REALLY CRYING

**amummy:** omg ouma im on my way

**dicktato:** nO DONT 

**amummy:** why not ??

**dicktato:** I DON'T WANT YOU TO SEE ME IN A STATE OF WEAKNESS AMAMI. IM AN UGLY CRIER DONT 

**amummy:** OUMA IM COMING

**Paino:** omg this 

**humansexual:** I really didn't mean to upset them... I have my own needs...

**insex:** To be perfectly truthful... it was a bit hurtful; Shinguuji, to invade their moment.

**humansexual:** I am so sorry...! I should've reconsidered.

**insex:** You really should have, Shinguuji! 

**oblivious:** momoTA PLEASE

**spacesucc:** woah woah woah kiibo what

**oblivious:** IT'S BACK I NEED HELP HOW DO I FIX IT

**midgetmurderer:** is he talking about arousal

**oblivious:** YES HEL P

**kinkyshiz:** woah woah WOAH okay

**spacesucc:** no kiibo you can't fuck me you'll end up hurting me

**oblivious:** I WON'T I PROMISE MOMTO SDIUFHSDFSH

**spacesucc:** woah he's malfunctioning i'd better go... gotta blast

**midgetmurderer:** did you just--

**killerWeebstar:** i wonder how oumami's going--

**dicktato:** i'm f-fine guys it's okay

**Paino:** omg ouma r u k

**amummy:** i just went into his room he is nOT an ugly crier. also we need to get that hole in his wall fixed ?? 

**dicktato:** yes can somebody fix that please... i mean i'm not coming out of my room for the next few days but yeah

**amummy:** i'll stay in there with you if you'd like

**oblivious:** i will bring you things

**amummy:** kiibo i'm his bf

**oblivious:** well im his f. f is friend.

**dicktato:** when the fuck did i befriend you kiibo

**oblivious has left the group.**

**spacesucc:** guys stop he's emotional, timid and fragile.

**spacesucc has added oblivious to the group.**

**oblivious:** ;nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn;

**spacesucc:** sh babe you're fine they're all assholes right

**Paino:** IM OKAY AREN'T I

**oblivious:** no not really

**Paino:** fuck you

 


	6. angie's fantastic questionnaire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> angie getting bored and asking the couples of the group questions  
> (inspired off of a prompt, but the link isn't working when i put it here...)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**hammeraesthetic:** alright :D!! so, who in this group is dating or something

**XxShadyEmoxX:** im with akamatsu ?

**oblivious:** momota told me that this applies to us.

**dicktato:** hello i've been summoned amami where tf are you

**amummy:** here babe

**killerWeebstar:** shinguuji and i are like a thing i guess ??

**Paino:** why??

**humansexual:** Why was this brought up, Angie?

**hammeraesthetic:** so! angie wanted to ask all you couples questions and things !!

**dicktato:** this sounds dumb

**spacesucc:** knowing her it probably is lol

**dicktato:** i'm not one to lower myself to peasant level but i do agree this t i m e

**amummy:** wtf r u two flirting

**hammeraesthetic:** guys!! don't stray off topic...! okay first question  >o<~!!

**hammeraesthetic:** which one of you has a sweet-tooth whereas the other likes savory things?

**hammeraesthetic:** oumami goes first, then kiibo and momota, then shirogane  & shinguuji, then aki and saiharaharahara~~~~~!

**dicktato:** is oumami a thing now --- anywayyy iT'S PRETTY FUCKING OBVIOUS IM THE SWEET TOOTH ANGIE

**amummy:** im neutral but if i had to chose i'd be more savory then sweet ---

**hammeraesthetic:** well said hehehe! now, kaibo?? (angie just came up with a couple name for them guys !!!)

**poofpoofmagik:** nice name (ill shut my face now so they can continue oops)

**oblivous:** kaibo...? that's closely matching my name so i assume you're talking to me. okay, i can't eat at all so this is invalid

**spacesucc:** im a bit of a sucker for sugar tbh  ---- 

**hammeraesthetic:** nice, nice what about shin and shiro?

**humansexual:** I'd say we're both savory... but when it comes to Japanese snacks, Shirogane is definitely a sweet-tooth...

**hammeraesthetic:**  coolio !!! saiharaararararararararararararararara??

**XxShadyEmoxX:** wtf angie --- but like.... im probably savory. same with akamatsu

**Paino:** ew no i'm a sweet-tooth you sick fuck i thought you loved me ew

**XxShadyEmoXx:** OMG IM SO SORRY ILL MAKE IT UP TO YOU I PROMISE !!! DON'T LEAVE ME OR I'LL BE NOTHING PLEASE AKAMATSU !!!

**hammeraesthetic:** return of the miraculous hormonal teenger :) 

**Paino:** saihara wtf youre emo af boi

**hammeraesthetic:** okay next one !! you guys can all answer this one at the same time because angie got bored halfway through the last one

**hammeraesthetic:** alright! so this is actually the last question since angie's thinking that she wanna go paint stuff soon as well ;u; buttt here it is

**hammeraesthetic:** this is real juicy !! who confessed first

**dicktato:** um

**humansexual:** I believe it was Shirogane, if I'm not mistaken.

**spacesucc:** ME OBVIOUSLY

**oblivious:** momota has told me that i was too oblivious to understand his feelings. i am still a bit apologetic for that.

**Paino:** O H MY GOD I REMEMBER IT WAS SAIHARA HE WAS BLUSHING SO MUCH AND AAAAAAAA

**dicktato:** if you  _really_ must know then...

**dicktato:** IT WAS AMAMI

**dicktato:** IT WAS ALLLL AMAMI

**dicktato:** HE LIKED SAID THE THING AND THEN

**dicktato:** I ACCEPTED BECAUSE IM SO KIND AND THINGS AND LIKE

**dicktato:** Y E A H 

**dicktato:** IT WAS ALL

**dicktato:** AMAMI

**amummy:** yeah no. ouma confessed to me by accident. we were hanging and we were just talking and he bLURTS "I LOVE YOU" I WAS ABOUT TO CRY

**hammeraesthetic:** aahhhh!!! that is s O CUTE AMAMI <33333

**hammeraesthetic:** sorry for freaking out there...! <3 <3 ~~~<3 o-O angie's gonna do somethin' else now, she gets easily bored sorry <3

**dicktato:** AMAMI IT WASN'T ME THAT IS NOT TRUE

**oblivious has sent a video to the group.**

**hammeraesthetic:** YOU RECORDED IT?!

**oblivious:** yes. i was outside of amami's room at the time and they did not notice me there.

**dicktato:** THIS IS LIKE THE 3RD EXPOSURE OF MY PRIVACY WTF

**amummy:** you're so fucking cute though ouma

**Paino:** oh my godddd this is too much--

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> saihara's emo phase needs to be addressed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**dicktato:** um guys what's happening

**amummy:** idk ?? what you're talking about ??

**XxShadyEmoxX:** ..

**Paino:** gUYS WHAT IS THAT NOISE WHO'S SCREAMING

**dicktato:** exACTLY

**humansexual:** Is there a chance that this ruckus can be ceased? It is distressing me.

**insex:** :( It sounds like someone's crying...!

**XxShadyEmoxX:** guys i feel so you know... like nothing

**Paino:** um saihara ??

**XxShadyEmoxX:** i just feel so... disassociated and things... i feel nothing... like a void of literally... nothing.

**amummy:** um r u k

**dicktato:** a MAMI YOU DO NOT COMFORT HIM OF ALL PEOPLE COMFORT ME

**amummy:** woahwoahwoahwoah callmmmm downnnn

**dicktato:** f i n e

**Paino:** so like what's u p

**XxShadyEmoxX:** i don't... really know i just feel like nothing matters... we're all gonna die anyways why are we even trying and just... hm.

**dicktato:** HE'S BEING EMO I KNEW IT WHEN I HEARD THE METAL MUSIC AND GOKUHARA SAID HE WAS CRYING

**antichildren:** saihara don't listen to them it's only a phase

**XxShadyEmoxX:** im not in the mood for memes guys... i might just get off for n-now...

**hammeraesthetic:** WOAH!! HE USED STUTTERING... THROUGH TEXT?!

**dicktato:** fine dude i'll stop but i have something for you ?? if you'll come out of your dark domain for just a minute i will hand it over ,,,

**XxShadyEmoxX:** no... it's probably a stupid meme or joke...

**dicktato:** iT'S NOT TRUST ME

**XxShadyEmoxX:** fine meet me in my dark domain

**amummy:** this isnt good im going to supervise bc we all know what ouma's like lol

**killerWeebstar:** ya ikr

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee:** This... surely will turn out to be a disaster.

**kinkyshiz:** guYS I HEAR YELLING AND SCREAMING

**midgetmurderer:** i think it's stopped ???

**kinkyshiz:** it has now but like

**spacesucc:** gUYS IT'S LIKE 1AM IM TRYING TO SLEEP

**kinkyshiz:** with kiibo ^

**oblivious:** affirmative. ^

**kinkyshiz:** w HAT I WAS JUST KIDDING HIRLHGDLKGDJHL;GDJGDHK

**spacesucc:** k i i BO BE QUIET n o O

**midgetmurderer:** if we had social media this would be plastered all over everyone's pages... 'kiibo ruins momota's secret attempt at being gay'

**spacesucc:** n O STOP IT YOU GUYS GHDGJKGDHKGDHKGLHGGDKHGDKJK;HGHK;GD

**oblivious:** momota is getting flutered. please cease the teasing.

**spacesucc:** flustERED IS NOT THE WORD TO USE,,,, KIIBO

**XxShadyEmoxX:** GUYS IM SCREAMING HJDFKJHDFJSE09UEUR5U438E545RDGHKDFKHDGKHGDKHDGKHGKJGDKHDGKJ45$%#$GDHDJDFJK THANK YOU OUMA

**Paino:** what did you do

**Paino:** ouma did you hurt him if you did i will kill you i'll have you know

**dicktato:** im satisfied lmaoo

**amummy:** im scoffing this is perfect

**Paino:** w HAT DID YOU DO

**dicktato:** saihara tell ur gf lol

**XxShadyEmoxX:** 200 dOLLAR HOT TOPIC VOUCHER IM EEING

**Paino:** s A I h a R A YOU  woRRIED m E

**dicktato:** hAH he loves hot tOPIC MORE THAN U

**Paino:** im offended can i die

**XxShadyEmoxX:** yeah yeah whatev just H O T   T O P I C

**amummy:** he TOLD YOU THAT YOU COULD DIE AS LONG AS YOU DONT INTERFERE WITH HOT TOPIC GIFT VOUCHER IM CACKLiNG

**dicktato:** oH MY GOD

**Paino:** SAIHARA I WILL SUE HOT TOPIC IF YOU DONT TAKE THAT BACK

**dicktato:** how could you threaten the precious emo like that kaede like wtf h OT TOPIC IS HIS WAY OUT

**amummy:** shame, kaede, shame....

**Paino:** G U Y S

**insex:** I'm glad everyone's getting along!

**kinkyshiz:** geTTING ALONG ?! BIGGEST JOKE OF 2016 GOKUHARA

**midgetmurderer:** ^

**windmill:** i'm starting to think you have a crush on iruma, hoshi !! disgusting !! stay away from mY FRIEND !!!!!!

**midgetmurderer:** i... i don't have a... what are you, in elementary?!

**windmill:** yes an all girl's school it's peaceful here

**midgetmurderer:** im gonna go kms bye

**kinkyshiz:** same

**midgetmurderer:** even more so now im flaming

**kinkyshiz:** why ew

**midgetmurderer:** you agreed with me aa

**kinkyshiz:** no n O stop hoshi it's gr o s s tenko help

**windmill:** no u can deal with that thing on ur own lol

**hammeraesthetic:** yumenooooo there's drama ~~~~

**poofpoofmagik: https://68.media.tumblr.com/3ebaf344c1e1cb043928470e331e55fe/tumblr_n3bk7hzcCt1rkthauo1_250.jpg**

**hammeraesthetic:** um

**poofpoofmagik:** whoops sorry hoLD ON

**kinkyshiz:** im chOKING ON NOTHING HOW DARE

**dicktato:** guys no stop im getting a headache these msg notifications are murdering my brain s T O P

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hA IM LAUGHING   
> yumeno originally wasnt supposed to send the link i just accidentally pasted it there when typing !!! so i kept it lol


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinguuji - humansexual  
> Toujou - IsThatASpeckOfDustISee  
> Shirogane - killerWeebstar  
> Chabashira - windmill hair  
> Momota - spacesucc  
> Saihara - XxShadyEmoxX  
> Amami - amummy  
> Gokuhara - insex  
> Angie - hammeraesthetic  
> Ouma - dicktato  
> Kiibo - oblivious  
> Akamatsu - paino  
> Harukawa - antichildren  
> Hoshi - midgetmurderer  
> Yumeno - poofpoofmagik  
> Iruma - kinkyshiz

**spacesucc:** guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guysguys guys guys

**Paino:** omg momota what do you W AN T

**spacesucc:** kiibo showed me how to add extensions to this omH

**Paino:** oh god please don't

**MusicPlayer extension has been added to this group.**

**Paino:** MOMOTA NO

**spacesucc has queued "beemovie.mp3" to the MusicPlayer.**

**insex:** Oh! Ouma was talking about this movie earlier on!

**amummy:** my handbook started yelling what the fuck

**dicktato:** ALRIGHT WHICH ONE OF YOU BASTARDS IS PLAYING THIS

**midgetmurderer:** no

**kinkyshiz:** i dont mean to agitate your little 'infatuation' with me hoshi,,, but i gotta agree... no.

**windmill:** GUYS GO ON PM I DONT WANT TO SEE HOSHI BEING FLIRTY

**midgetmurderer:** i'm not

**kinkyshiz:** ew

**midgetmurderer:** wanna form the anti-tenko squad? i'll let you be leader iruma ;^)

**kinkyshiz:** n                                                     o.

**oblivious:** how do i make the handbook stop? it is playing sounds.

**Paino:** ASK YOUR BOYFRIEND KIIBO HE'S BEHIND THIS

**spacesucc has queued "yee10hrloop.mp3" to the MusicPlayer.**

**dicktato:** FCUCKING STOP

**insex:** Language!!!!!!

**spacesucc:** hey guys what's happening?? i just?? yeah????????

**Paino:** you're not getting out of this one space boy now,,,, just,,,, stop the ,,,,, music,,,,, player,,,, it's bad,,,,,

**spacesucc:** no by3e

**oblivious:** tenko momota said girls are bad go defeat him i want the musicplayer to stop.

**windmill:** WHAT THE FUCK

**windmill:** FUCK I TOHOUGHT YOU CWERE KINDA OK BUT NOW YOU'VE DONE IT OYU LITTLE FUCK

**spacesucc:** gotta blast

**midgetmurderer:** . i . .... this...

**poofpoofmagik:** guys im tired what's happening why is it playing the bee movie audio

**kinkyshiz:** alright this has gone on long enough im opening the 'hand your digital handbook in to iruma for it to be fucking annihilated so it will stop playing bee movie' stand,,,, who wants to be my first customer

**midgetmurderer:** me

**kinkyshiz:** due to complications the business has been permanently closed

**midgetmurderer:** am i that bad

**humansexual:** Yes.

**Paino:** Yes.

**windmill:** Yes.

**dicktato:** Yes.

**amummy:** Yes.

**spacesucc:**  Yes.

**oblivious:** Yes.

**kinkyshiz:** Yes.

**insex:** Yes.

**hammeraesthetic:** Yes.

**poofpoofmagik:** Yes.

**IsThatASpeckOfDustISee:** Yes.

**antichildren:** Yes.

**XxShadyEmoxX:** Yes.

**killerWeebstar:** Yes.

**midgetmurderer:** is there anybody ok with being killed bc i kinda wanna die rn who wants to do the favour

**Paino:** well i mean tenko probably wouldnt mind but she's preoccupied with spacesucc,, i mean momota jfc

**spacesucc:** no she hasnt come yet

**oblivious:** oh. momota IS here. turn off this thing or i will leave you. alone. in your room. right now.

**spacesucc has paused the MusicPlayer.**

**insex:** What happened to the audio :(?

**XxShadyEmoxX:** OH MY  DOG THANK YOU

**Paino:** saihara i didnt agree to oh my dog that wasn't on the contract

**hammeraesthetic:**!!!!!! oh my dog is angie's new motto now!!! oh my dog  <333333333!!!!!!

**XxShadyEmoxX:** bye

**XxShadyEmoxX has left the chatroom.**

**Paino has added XxShadyEmoxX to the chatroom.**

**Paino:** sorry you're not getting out of this one,,, hormonal teenager,,,,

**XxShadyEmoxX:**  but what if i like,,,, put down the handbook??????????

**Paino has queued "screaming.fuck.mp3" to the MusicPlayer.**

**dicktato:** what the fuck is screaming fuck

**dicktato:** oh my god,,,, this,,,, this is

**XxShadyEmoxX:** you didnt

**Paino:** it will continue to play saihara, it will CONTINUE TO PLAY

**amummy:** did you record saihara blasting his shitty metal music and his sobs

**Paino:** didnt really need it at the time but now i feel like that was the best decision i made since like ever

**insex:** Does anybody know how to fix the handbooks? Mine is crying and I don't know why it's sad :(

**Paino:** omg,, gonta

**Paino has paused the MusicPlayer.**

**dicktato:** can you guys stop being fucks and kinda just?? let me?? think in peace????

**amummy:** can somebody stop the sobs

**Paino:** i did?? a while ago??

**amummy:** MINE IS STILL GOING

**dicktato:** IM HERE AND I ?? I CAN CONFIRM IT IS STILL G O I N G

**Paino:** you must be lagging,,, whoops

**amummy:** THIS IS BAD HOW DO I GET IT TO STOP WHAT IF IT DOESNT STOP

**kinkyshiz:** amami you wanna help me open my business again you cant tell hoshi though

**midgetmurderer:** i have been summoned ;)

**kinkyshiz:** sorry amami can't help you anymore gotta fling myself into the sun

**amummy:** goddamn it iruma

**Paino:** guys im actually kinda trying to finish my piano piece here im gonna turn off notifications bye

 

 


End file.
